Wednesday, December 29, 2010

How Did It All Begin?

Here's something that stresses me out. Maybe you, too.
When it's a holiday and I do something like, serve hot cocoa or ask the kids to play games I wonder if it will become a thing. You know, like a tradition thing. And then we'll have to do it year after year after year. And then I worry, is it good enough to carry on, pass along, talk about?

And who really knows. Traditions are weird. I thought I had a bunch of Christmas traditions established. But this year, we didn't do a single one of them. In fact, Coop asked me if we could observe Hanukkah next year.
I've always believed that Christmas Eve is the very best day of the entire November through January extravaganza no known as The Holidays. I've tried to make that night special and I've
prepared for it in a different way each year. But now I'm really trying to determine what expectations I'm setting.

I tend to look at everything through the myopic eye of mother's guilt. If we sit down to a night of games I wonder if what the family will want to carry over the following year is the night of playing games, the actual game we played, the popcorn and trail mix we ate, or the matching pajamas we wore. What resonated with them?

Will the kids in time discover that by re-enacting these nights in matching pajamas, or eating popcorn we are grasping at the closeness of family? The wondering and the worrying is making me crazy.


laurel said...

I feel the same way. In fact on Christmas Eve I cried a little because I was worried the kids didn't like what we were doing this year and I should have done it differently. They seemed happy, so I don't know why I worried....that mother's guilt thing I guess.

ALso, I did A LOT of the Grandma CHristmas party this year. I wanted it to be fun for everyone. So far one cousing left early cuz we weren't really doing anything fun and another thought we did too much. I guess you really can't please everyone. Maybe next year, I need to chill and just see what others bring to the table. Maybe my kids etc will offer something up.

Oh, year I won't have to worry about a thing. I will be in Hawaii. I guess I can try it in 2012.

Glenda said...

And that worrying and wondering continues....even when you are a grandma. I read something that I really liked....An author posed this question....What accidental happening has become a cherished tradition? Maybe, that is the best way to develop traditions!!!!Sort of like you and Trent pounding on the ceiling!